The Tally

It took me less time than I thought. Thanks to google search this blog button. Only 17 out of 369 posts, in guess 370 if you include this one are about being lonely. Which is surprising, because I thought I bitched about being lonely more than that. Sweet. That's only 4.6% of all of my posts which is really nothing. Wow.

I really need to sleep.

Loneliness

I had the best music class today. We watched Bugs Bunny and listened to Aida. I was thinking about my past few posts.... and really if I wasn't doing this posting thing, I would have put them up because I really had nothing to write about. I've become less introspective as I have gotten older. I think I'm past my introspective prime.

Or am I? Maybe I don't look inside myself anymore because I'm scared of what I will find. Or maybe that isn't it at all? Maybe its just that I am finally happy with my life. I'm no longer lonely, although I find it harder to be alone now than ever. Does that make sense?I guess it does, I mean humans are social creatures, so it would make sense that I am happier with someone than without. It's weird, because I wasn't really unhappy before, I was just lonely.

Maybe it is because I have surrounded myself with such great people I can't help but want to spent time with them. I mean this is the first time since second year university that I have actually liked and enjoyed the company of my roommates. I mean, we're friends and we do stuff together which doesn't often happen when a bunch of random people move in together.

But at the same time, can one really be happy and lonely at the same time? I think they can, as long as they don't dwell on the fact that they are lonely. I'd be kind of interested to look back and see how many posts in my blogging past were about being lonely. Maybe I will and I'll get back to you sometime this month- you know while I am posting everyday. Or not. We'll see. I'll keep you posted. Quite literally.