It was fun while it lasted, but I'm heading home today to Brooks. The strike continues (although someone yesterday trying to tell me they had gone back to work), and the lastest news is the CFIA - the Canadian Food Inspection Agency is not crossing the picket line until they deem it safe to do so. (see news article here) Honestly, I don't blame them. The few times I crossed the picketline- not in the protection of the large van they brought us in last time- I was scared for my safety too. So we probably won't get any samples until they start working which means our 12 hour shift are going to go by really slow. Got to love essential services. The same thing would happen if we didn't cross the picket line. They could slaughter, but without our results from the slaughter samples, they can't process the meat and thus production would come to a halt. But the last time I went to work, there wasn't much of a picket line on our side which makes more sense.
I'm putting off driving home. I don't want to go. But I know I don't have that much longer so it isn't nearly as bad as it was before. Anyhow... life calls or at least life's little errands call. So until next time- Happy Trails!
State: Meh...
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Thursday, October 20, 2005
Good Things
For all the bad that has happened to me in the past little while, some good was eventually going to have to come. The good thing that has come from this strike is that I get a little holiday. YAY! Instead of only being off for the weekend, I'm off until Wednesday. I'm thrilled really. I was planning on going up to Edmonton anyways, but this means that I can stay longer than I might have before! And when I get back- I work two days and I have another weekend off. Honestly, I couldn't be luckier!!!
I think is over for the people that are striking. I mean the plant is running now, probably doing about half as much work as they did before the strike (one shift) and they are no longer bringing the scabs into our parking lot. They aren't even busing the workers over anymore. They are letting them drive right into the plant. This makes sense in a lot of ways. It means that instead of having to cross the picket line 3 times to get workers in, they only have to cross once to get in and once to get out. The buses where to protect the workers, but when you have to cross a picket line to get to the proctection of a bus it really defeats the purpose of a bus. The only problem with this is that it kind of slows traffic on the Trans-Canada highway. But I don't care about that really- there is a lane for the people who aren't going to Lakeside and one going to the plant. I feel a lot safer going to work. While they still stop us for 5 minutes going in and out, there are no taunt, name calling or intimidation because they know that we aren't part of the union and so cannot strike. It is much, much nicer. I think that we still get stopped because we are essential to the running of the plant so slowing us down, slows the plant down.
Anyhow... that's all I really have to say right now. I think I will go write me some e-mails telling people I'm invading Edmonton!
State: happy as a lark
I think is over for the people that are striking. I mean the plant is running now, probably doing about half as much work as they did before the strike (one shift) and they are no longer bringing the scabs into our parking lot. They aren't even busing the workers over anymore. They are letting them drive right into the plant. This makes sense in a lot of ways. It means that instead of having to cross the picket line 3 times to get workers in, they only have to cross once to get in and once to get out. The buses where to protect the workers, but when you have to cross a picket line to get to the proctection of a bus it really defeats the purpose of a bus. The only problem with this is that it kind of slows traffic on the Trans-Canada highway. But I don't care about that really- there is a lane for the people who aren't going to Lakeside and one going to the plant. I feel a lot safer going to work. While they still stop us for 5 minutes going in and out, there are no taunt, name calling or intimidation because they know that we aren't part of the union and so cannot strike. It is much, much nicer. I think that we still get stopped because we are essential to the running of the plant so slowing us down, slows the plant down.
Anyhow... that's all I really have to say right now. I think I will go write me some e-mails telling people I'm invading Edmonton!
State: happy as a lark
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
The Strike
So maybe this is hitting fairly low on the news radar elsewhere, but here is it pretty big and serious. I just have a few opinions on the matter seeing as I am fairly directly involved even though I am not part of the union. They brought our people into it when they decided to put all the people wanting the cross the picket line on the property where the lab resides.
Because we are not union members we are required to go to work despite having no work to do. That will probably change soon as they have been able to get some people across the picket line into work on Tuesday and thus we will be returning to work tomorrow. What sucks is we have to cross the picket line too and suffer through all the name calling and abuse to go to work. I can tell that has not been fun at all. And honestly I don't think I should have to go through that to go to work. Tomorrow should be better because we are going in a van where they won't be able to see us. And when you get them to understand that you don't work for the packing plant, they seem to settle down; sometimes, it is hard to make them understand though.
I don't know why the union decided to strike without having a greater majority of people behind them. It almost defeats the purpose of a union. I mean a union is there to protect the workers against the company, but the only way they can do that is to provide a united front.
Anyhow... maybe I'll rant more later from the comfort of somewhere that is not Brooks. Until next time...
State: Opinionated
Because we are not union members we are required to go to work despite having no work to do. That will probably change soon as they have been able to get some people across the picket line into work on Tuesday and thus we will be returning to work tomorrow. What sucks is we have to cross the picket line too and suffer through all the name calling and abuse to go to work. I can tell that has not been fun at all. And honestly I don't think I should have to go through that to go to work. Tomorrow should be better because we are going in a van where they won't be able to see us. And when you get them to understand that you don't work for the packing plant, they seem to settle down; sometimes, it is hard to make them understand though.
I don't know why the union decided to strike without having a greater majority of people behind them. It almost defeats the purpose of a union. I mean a union is there to protect the workers against the company, but the only way they can do that is to provide a united front.
Anyhow... maybe I'll rant more later from the comfort of somewhere that is not Brooks. Until next time...
State: Opinionated
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Why?
Why am I still so scared to open up to people, especially people I care about? I'm afraid of getting hurt and I guess not making yourself vulnerable, not sharing what you are feeling because you are scared about how someone will react saves you from getting hurt. It also saves you from having any sort of meaningful relationship with anyone. I know all this and yet I continue to keep things from the people I care about. I'm living a lie and I know it. This makes me sick inside. I want to change but I am scared. But what is worse- being honest and getting hurt or living a lie? I think I am going to have to choose honesty in the end.
Saturday, October 08, 2005
Christmas and Other Travesties of Nature
Ever since I moved out of the trailer park, I have been looking to increase the amount of kitchen stuff I have. It sucks trying to cook in a poorly equipped kitchen, especially when one is used to having pretty much everything you need to make something. I'm almost there- right now I am missing big bowls but this is only because I am picky and want a certain type.
So, this weekend my mom and I decided to scope out the shops to see what deals we could find. I bought an awesome salad spinner (yes, I actually use a salad spinner- wet lettuce is a pet-peeve of mine), got a good deal on a toaster oven (which are much more practical than a simple toaster because you can do so much with them) and even bought some cookie sheets. All and all- a good lot of purchases. What sickened me more than anything while shopping for these items is that I felt like it was two months later than it actually is because most of the stores have their CHRISTMAS STUFF OUT!!! Is it just me or are the stores trying to shove Christmas down our throats earlier and earlier? I have nothing against doing Christmas shopping early- but can you hold off on putting of your christmas displays until Halloween is over? There isn't even snow on the ground yet. I know why they probably do it. It is a psychological thing. If people see Christmas stuff, they will think about Christmas and start thinking- "Oh I should start my shopping." And thus might start shopping sooner for gifts and might therefore might spend more money(the stores are hoping).
My mom and I had a good thankgiving. I made my first totally from scratch pie and it turned out really good. Pie turns out to be not so bad to make. I watched Hockey Night in Canada tonight. It was nice to see Hockey back on TV again. It was weird before to see movie night in Canada.
I wish I had someone to talk to tonight. It's kind of late to be phoning anyone, I would if I knew I wouldn't be waking anyone up. I get I'm just having one of those nights where it would be nice to hear someone's voice.
Ryan and I have been "together" for 6 months as of today. I think that would mean more to me if I had actually spent a lot of those 6 months with him. But as it is with long distance relationships, I haven't. It's hard, especially when I visit and I really don't want to leave.
Working at a job you know wouldn't make you happy for the rest of your life gives you lots of time to think about what you might like to do. I'm really not sure, but I have been thinking of maybe becoming a teacher of some sort either at the High School or College or even maybe the University level. I really don't know what kind of job I would be happy doing- but I am starting to consider those as an option because I love it when my friends come to me and ask me to explain stuff to them and I love the challenge of trying to get them to understand.
Anyhow... I thought I had something deep and meaningful to say this time, but I don't. I guess it's not meant to come out tonight. Hope everyone else has a most Happy Thanksgiving!
State: Lonely (a common state as of late)
Countdown: 84 days, 0 hours and 12 minutes remaining
So, this weekend my mom and I decided to scope out the shops to see what deals we could find. I bought an awesome salad spinner (yes, I actually use a salad spinner- wet lettuce is a pet-peeve of mine), got a good deal on a toaster oven (which are much more practical than a simple toaster because you can do so much with them) and even bought some cookie sheets. All and all- a good lot of purchases. What sickened me more than anything while shopping for these items is that I felt like it was two months later than it actually is because most of the stores have their CHRISTMAS STUFF OUT!!! Is it just me or are the stores trying to shove Christmas down our throats earlier and earlier? I have nothing against doing Christmas shopping early- but can you hold off on putting of your christmas displays until Halloween is over? There isn't even snow on the ground yet. I know why they probably do it. It is a psychological thing. If people see Christmas stuff, they will think about Christmas and start thinking- "Oh I should start my shopping." And thus might start shopping sooner for gifts and might therefore might spend more money(the stores are hoping).
My mom and I had a good thankgiving. I made my first totally from scratch pie and it turned out really good. Pie turns out to be not so bad to make. I watched Hockey Night in Canada tonight. It was nice to see Hockey back on TV again. It was weird before to see movie night in Canada.
I wish I had someone to talk to tonight. It's kind of late to be phoning anyone, I would if I knew I wouldn't be waking anyone up. I get I'm just having one of those nights where it would be nice to hear someone's voice.
Ryan and I have been "together" for 6 months as of today. I think that would mean more to me if I had actually spent a lot of those 6 months with him. But as it is with long distance relationships, I haven't. It's hard, especially when I visit and I really don't want to leave.
Working at a job you know wouldn't make you happy for the rest of your life gives you lots of time to think about what you might like to do. I'm really not sure, but I have been thinking of maybe becoming a teacher of some sort either at the High School or College or even maybe the University level. I really don't know what kind of job I would be happy doing- but I am starting to consider those as an option because I love it when my friends come to me and ask me to explain stuff to them and I love the challenge of trying to get them to understand.
Anyhow... I thought I had something deep and meaningful to say this time, but I don't. I guess it's not meant to come out tonight. Hope everyone else has a most Happy Thanksgiving!
State: Lonely (a common state as of late)
Countdown: 84 days, 0 hours and 12 minutes remaining
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
No more guilt
I don't feel guilty anymore for leaving early. I was for awhile, even though I knew I shouldn't. Some people I will leave unnamed at work even tried to convince me to stay by guilting me with, " We spent all this money to train you, and you leave us so soon..." What I don't think they realize is I've invested a lot too. More than most people would for a job. I've risked and continue to risk my health. This is foremost in my mind right now after visiting my kidney doctor. My kidney's aren't working any better than they were three months ago. Not that I expected they would. I mean the doctors did told they were permanently damaged, but I guess in the back of my mind, I always hoped for some small miracle and that my kidneys would return to normal. But they haven't and I am seriously considering my doctor's recommendation of going on blood pressure medication. In fact, I am trying it for a week to see how my body reacts to it. Honestly, it scares me that to save my kidneys from dying young (and thus saying me from dying young) I might have to be on medication for the rest of my life.
All that said, how can I feel guilty for leaving a job that made me so sick in first place? I don't think I can. I think it was a really stupid decision, on my part, to go back in the first place, but I didn't think of it that way at the time. I guess what I've realized in the past little while is how short life is and how quickly it can be taken away from you. I think that is what kills me the most about being down in Brooks right now. I'm doing a job that requires very little thinking and other than the multitasking (which I am getting better at) offers me almost no mental challenge. It is sucking the life out of me. I don't feel like I am living right now, at least not when I am down there. What a difference I feel when I leave there even just to come spend time with my mom in Calgary. But leaving to come visit people in Calgary or Edmonton is bitter sweet because I know in a few short days I'll have to return to a place that makes me feel like I am dying inside. I've tried to make friends with at least my co-workers and they say they'll invite me to do stuff with them, but they never do. I feel like I am wasting part of my life, that all the time I am spending down there not living could be spent elsewhere- living.
I might sound melodramatic to some right now and I know some people will tell me, "Chin up, it will get better." Well, I will keep my chin up, but I doubt it will get better. I want to keep a positive attitude (or at least try to) so that time doesn't seem as wasted. I'll spend time on my hobbies, and hopefully that will make my days off pass more quickly. I'll try to keep my mind off the dead feeling I have inside and on to the good things in my life. Because time passes much more quickly when you don't wallow in your misery. I've spent too much time in my life doing that, so I'll just use my blog as a channel or vessel for my sadness and hope that perhaps I can carry on with just a glimmer of happiness.
State: Pensive
All that said, how can I feel guilty for leaving a job that made me so sick in first place? I don't think I can. I think it was a really stupid decision, on my part, to go back in the first place, but I didn't think of it that way at the time. I guess what I've realized in the past little while is how short life is and how quickly it can be taken away from you. I think that is what kills me the most about being down in Brooks right now. I'm doing a job that requires very little thinking and other than the multitasking (which I am getting better at) offers me almost no mental challenge. It is sucking the life out of me. I don't feel like I am living right now, at least not when I am down there. What a difference I feel when I leave there even just to come spend time with my mom in Calgary. But leaving to come visit people in Calgary or Edmonton is bitter sweet because I know in a few short days I'll have to return to a place that makes me feel like I am dying inside. I've tried to make friends with at least my co-workers and they say they'll invite me to do stuff with them, but they never do. I feel like I am wasting part of my life, that all the time I am spending down there not living could be spent elsewhere- living.
I might sound melodramatic to some right now and I know some people will tell me, "Chin up, it will get better." Well, I will keep my chin up, but I doubt it will get better. I want to keep a positive attitude (or at least try to) so that time doesn't seem as wasted. I'll spend time on my hobbies, and hopefully that will make my days off pass more quickly. I'll try to keep my mind off the dead feeling I have inside and on to the good things in my life. Because time passes much more quickly when you don't wallow in your misery. I've spent too much time in my life doing that, so I'll just use my blog as a channel or vessel for my sadness and hope that perhaps I can carry on with just a glimmer of happiness.
State: Pensive
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